One day the little enchantress will know the power of the craft she is so naturally potent in!

I take out the flash cards hoping we will go further in recognizing the opposites. Secretly also hoping it will help her memorize the shape and texture of all words we read and see. But she? She gives me this

And I say.. Dia look this is a..?

Dia: Giraffe mama

Me: yea and see they are two this one is (pointing at the taller one)

Dia: This is maamaa giraffe

Me: right.. this is Mama so she is tall. And the baby giraffe is?

Dia: Smallerrrrrrr

Me: yea and also he is short right

Dia: right he is short

Dia: and baby giraffe loves to run... and every time mama says slow down baby giraffe you are going too ahead of me you will get lost.

Me: Ahan.. (wondering where is this going... please dont go all Freud on me there are more stories coming)

Dia: But the baby giraffe runs faster and faster and mama comes behind slowly she is tired :(

Me: wow thats such a nice story isn't it.
and she says no this is not a nice story because the giraffe runs and doesn't listen to mommy. and I am thinking ... "is that morality" or is it just her way of telling me that she recognizes all those times I tell her to slow down that running far away she is testing her boundaries...
she doesnt give me much time to think and draws another pair

Dia: Look mamma a finished apple

 Me: yea and look at this one this one is?

Dia: whole

Me: yes and its also an apple that someone may have just started to eat right? so start and finish

Dia: yea start

Me: (wondering if i will get lucky with another story i ask) Dia so do we have a story of apple?

Dia: yeaaaa

Dia: One day Adiyah was hungry (am absolutely marveling at her start). And she went to the dressing table to look for noodles (why dressing table? why not kitchen? noodles because that what she was eating when we were doing this activity)

Dia (cont): but there were no noodles on the table instead (she used the word "balkay" i was so proud lol) there was an apple.

So dia ate the apple until it was half done and here is the rest of the apple (while pointing at the finished apple)

Me: Oh wow now this was a nice story wasnt it?

Dia: yea mamma you liked this story?

Me: yes i love you story

This time i pick another pair and say, "Look dia, whats up here"

Dia: Oooh look at this ship one is Nazdeek and another one is sooo far

Me: right and nazdeek in english is? 9and she gives me a quizzical look... its almost funny how she can still not tell which words are English and which ones are Urdu.. but am kinda glad for this blessing)

Me: its also near

Dia: Oh yea near and far, and mamma you know

(and I could see another story coming in....)

Dia: when the ship for near they shouted common Adiyah hurry up lets get on the ship but i could not reach to the ship on time

Me: and then?

Dia: then when I reached close to the river the ship was far far away and I said "wait i want to go also"

Me: oh o, then what happen

Dia: (she makes her voice dramatic) and then mamma i jumped in the water and swam swam swam until i reached the ship. Then i climbed up the ship but you know what

Me: what

Dia: the ship was made of wood and when I jumped on it I hurt my knee

Me: oh o, did it hurt

Dia: yes but I am ok now, I am so brave

Me: That you are my love!!!

This was the next pair

now you guess what the story went like.... a hint... it had a dream sequence lol....





  

آزادئ پاکستان

آزادئ پاکستان

سب کی چمکی ہے دکان

کہیں پہ بیس کہیں ہے تیس

کہیں انیس سے سینتالیس

سیل پہ لگائ سب نے لان

اسکولوں میں ہے سیلبریشن

فیس پر ہے انفلیشن

چینلوں نے بند کی ان بن

Masala tv changed the slogan

پاکستان سے کرو پیار

پر کهانے بناو مصالحہ دار

مانا کہنا ہے بیکار

کہے بنا پر رہنا بار

آزادئ پاکستان، ویلینٹان یا ہو رمضان

سب سے پہلے تهی دکان سب سے پہلے ہے دکان


Azadi-e-Pakistan
Sab ki chamki hai dukan

kaheen pe bees (20), kaheen hai tees (30)
kaheen unees se saintalees(19-47)
sale pe lagai sab ne lawn

schoolon mai hai celebration
fees per hai inflation
channels ne band ki an ban
Masala Tv changes the slogan

"Pakistan se karo pyar
par khane banao masalezar"
mana kehna hai bekar
kahe bina per rehna bar
Azadi-e-Pakistan, Valentine, ya ho Ramzan
sab se pehle thi dukan, sab se pehle hai dukan  

7 things we should be thankful to Exams for...

One awesome thing that I am required to do as a full time teacher is to sit through hours of nerve wreaking boredom that exam invigilation brings with it! Anyway here I am after 2.5 (which feel more like 25) hrs of not doing anything but staring at a group of students taking their final exams with a fellow teacher. My only job there is to ensure that they mind their own exam paper and not others. Watching them write frantically looking up every now and then to glance at the wall clock and act as if the final hour of doom is approaching I keep telling myself, "whoever said time is relative was absolutely right."

Anyway so after what felt like eternity, I am done with my duty, I hand over the collected papers at the examination office and take the stairs down to my office. On my way I cant resist overhearing students that sat in my class discuss a particular accounting question and how one girl had gotten the answer wrong. As she does the usual, "array yaar" business around it one of the boys comments, "If you had sat at the back with us all you would have too gotten it right". I look up to him as hes caught mid sentence realizing a second too late who was passing by.

I am torn between what to do and I end up pretending I heard nothing as I see him making that awkward face we all Pakistanis make when caught red handed for a crime we consider to be too small to be a crime really.

For the rest of the day however I couldn't help but think about how I should thank exams or perhaps more appropriately thank how exams are often conducted for undoing so many things we teachers try to do throughout the term. With the power of marks/numbers/grades behind them this great tool called exam teaches our students so much more about learning and the approach to it than what I can.

So, as i marvel at the student's ability to elude me rather than marveling at what they have learned during the term I thought i might as well write this post for my fellow teachers as "x number of things they should thank the idea of examination and the way its usually conducted in our academic scene"

1. We should thank exams for teaching our students that dishonesty is great specially when marks are involved.
(be it a sign language created for MCQ confirmation, to one's ability to look at teacher in the eye and act so genuinely surprised when pointed out for cheating that the teacher starts having self doubt...)

2. We should thank exams for making students believe that the outcome is more important than the process
(an therefore, if they got the answer right the means with which they got it wont matter)

3. We should thank the exam for helping students develop an understanding that a momentary reproduction of knowledge is a greater goal than internalizing and evaluating what they have been exposed to

4. We should thank the exams for making our kids look at us as not people who genuinely care about their growth, development and learning but as tricksters who try their hardest to create confusion and chaos in their otherwise uncomplicated lives

5. We should thank exams to help emphasize the importance of one right answer, written in one particular way, hand written in pretty writing over a standard word count.

6. We should thank exams for ensuring that out students understand that time will always be against them and the champion is not the one who takes his time but instead one who masters that time by doing it the fastest

and kind of all of this together 

7. We should thank exams as being the unyielding part of the system of education that manages to somehow disseminate knowledge without really teaching at all... a system that sees mistake in inability to demonstrate knowing rather than seeing mistake in how knowledge was arrived at

Haram kamai halaal ghost all over again...

To my fellow flat dwellers

تمهاری اور میری بالکونی کے ساته اجیب رشتہ داری ہے

تنہائ کے وہ لمہے جو ہم نے اس سے بانٹے ہیں

وہ تمام اداس نہیں لیکن

دکه،  یاسیت، نہ پوری ہونے والی خواہشوں کی تمازت

محبتوں میں بهیگی مسکراہٹوں سے کئ زیادہ ہے

اس ایک کونے میں

 رات کے اندهیروں میں

 تنہائ کی بانہوں میں ہم  جی بهر کے روے ہیں

گلی سے گزرتی گاڑی کی ہیڈ لائٹ کو بلامقصد 

کسی سوچ کے حصار میں دور تک

کیا ہے follow

اکیلی سوتی چیل کی  

پہ رشک کیا ہے independence

تاروں کو نہیں آسمان کو دیکهنا

نادانستگی سے 

پے جلتے بهجتے بلب کو تکتے جانا radio mast

خود سے سوال کرنا

سردی سے لڑنا اور پهر ہار جانا

باور کرانا کہ آزادی اپنی بولی بہت اونچی لگاتی ہے

ایسے میں بالکونی گهر کے دائرے میں

 کے صراب کے wilderness
 مناسب کر لیتی ہے

For my non urdu readers

Transliteration

Somewhat translation

Tumhari aur meri, balcony ke sath ajeab rishtadari hai  Tanhai ke wo lamhai jo hum ne us se bantay hain Wo tamam udas nahi lekin dukh, yasiyat, na puri hone wali khwahishon ki tamazat (heat) muhabaton main bheegi muskurahaton se kai zyada hai is ek kone mai rat ke andheroon mai tanhai ki banhoon mai , hum gi bhar ke roye hain gali se guzarti gari ki headlight ko bila maqsad,  kisi soch ke hisar mai, dur tak follow kia hai akeli soti chial (eagle) ki independence pe rashq kia hai taroon ko nahi asmaan ko dekhna nadanstagi  (unintentionally) se radio mast pe jalte bujhtay bulb ko taktay jana khud se sawal karna sardi se larna or phir har jana  bawr karana (to convince) ke azadi apni boli bohat unchi lagaty hai  aise mai, balcony, ghar ke daire mai wilderness ke sarab (mirage) ke munasib kar leti hai

you (flat dwellers) and I share a strange relationship with balcony  the moments of loneliness that we have shared with it are not all remorseful however,  sorrow, longing and unfulfilled wishes hold a greater share than fulfilled moments of love and completion  this one spot bears witness to  many dark nights of solitude, of countless tears  it bears witness to unthinkingly following the headlights of the car until it disappears somewhere in the dark  it holds the jealousy we have felt for the independence of the solitary eagle sleeping across  it has seen us look at the sky and not search for the stars and the blankness of the stare as we keep watching the flashing light on the radio mast in distance it has seen us question ourselves  fighting the cold, and then giving up  it bears witness to our resignation for the high price independence puts on itself  settling for the mirage of the same that balcony has to offer within the security of home...

America Jaisa: Like America

A couple of days ago I had an important work event scheduled early in the morning. 

Being me I had to rush and had no time to do breakfast so I thought if I order food to get delivered it will arrive by the time I get ready and this way I will get to eat and leave early too. 

 To all those who are aware of my constant cry about my weight please stop shaking their heads and think about how jealous you are of the fact that in this part of the world you can get McDonald's to deliver breakfast at your doorstep ... yes I know you can almost smell the yumness of Mcmuffin and and hear the crunch as you almost chew into that goodness called hash browns but let me get back to my story which offers more than a juicy borrowed bite from the company me and my daughter jointly love to devour under the disappointing stares of our health and nutrition continuous beloved friends and family members.

So after i quickly ate my breakfast got ready I dashed out of the door grabbing the accompanying cup of coffee to finish on the way in the car since I cant do scathingly hot beverages without burning my taste buds. 

I walk into the lift, there is an uncle there already (hes around my father's age).. I nod at him in acknowledgement he nods back. I would have been perfectly fine spending the next few seconds in awkward silence strangers go through when sharing an elevator but apparently uncle is not so he attempts to talk and he says, "Aaj kal to Pakistan mai bhi sab America jaisa ho gaya hai" (tr. These days everything i Pakistan is also like America) and am like, "hmmm" and thinking to my self "seriously uncle! I mean I understand how elderly are always about well-meaning ill comments but I dont even know you and you can look at my sleeveless outfit and thin strip of dupatta and can go ahead and comment on how I am not very Pakistanily dressed?... I mean you have the right to comment but how politically correct is it to do it in front of me but since when is the dad crowd politically correct... (long chain of thought for a 5 floor lift ride but i guess brain does think with the speed of light) 

So here I am silently judging an uncle who is obviously not so silently judging me when he interjects my chain of though with an additional comment, "bhaga doori itni ho gai hai ab yahan bhi theek sai beth kar nashta karna mushkil ho gaya hai" (tr. life is so fast here also now that you cant really do breakfast in peace) I respond, "haan sahi baat hai" (tr. yea thats true) and walk out of the lift with my deflated balloon of parochiality...

Perspective

اپنے ہی قید خانوں میں

زنگ زدہ قفس لگے دروازوں کے پیچھے 

کھڑکی سے جھانکتی میں 

آزادی کے دن گنتی ہوں

apnay hi Qaid Khano (prison) main

zang zada (rusted) qafas (lock) lagay darwazon ke pechay

Khirki se jhanki main

Aazadi ke din ginti hoon

tr.

In my own prisons

behind the doors with rusted locks on them

I peak through the window

counting days to my freedom .... argh the translation kills it!